A reason to smile..

I realised as I grow older, the number of times I smiled in a day, is drastically reducing. I was wondering if, the reasons to smile have become less? Or, just that I have stopped appreciating those little things, which once made me smile. 

A new dress made me smile when I was a kid, the smell of rain, an unexpected holiday, going to a movie, a window seat in a bus, so many little things that made me smile, are now slowly fading away. There are so many problems, responsibilities and worries in life now, that, these things have taken a backseat. Wow, I have officially become a boring adult!

I don't sing out loud anymore or try out different hairstyles or change my mobile wallpaper everyday. I don't keep fancy mobile ringtones anymore. I don't buy expensive stationary anymore. I don't even care if it's my birthday - duh! I am just growing old. Is this how it feels to be a grown up? This sucks. 

I was thinking about all this, while I was travelling in bus to work. I checked my reflection on the mobile screen and wondered when those lips last curved upward. But only till that particular bus stop arrived.

A little girl (maybe 4-5yrs old) was with her grandfather in that particular bus stop to send her mother off to work. Her mother got inside the bus and looked out of the window and waved at that little girl. The girl was so happy, her whole face lit up with a broad smile. She jumped up and down, and waved at her mother with so much joy. It was such a pleasing sight and I could sense that my lips slowly curved up.

This happens every single day. Now I have started looking forward to that particular bus stop every day. Just the look of that little girl's face makes me smile and my day is done. Then I thought there are still beautiful things existing in this world, but I have just stopped noticing - just like a baby's laughter goes unnoticed in a crowded bus. People just complain when a baby cries. 

I feel like I am travelling very fast in a highway road, so fast that, I cannot look anywhere, except forward towards my destination, and suddenly, a tiny butterfly flaps its beautiful wings and flies next to me and says - look at me and smile.

To that little girl who has given me a reason to smile...

"... and I am proud of its rich and varied heritage"

My sister, who lives in Dublin, Ireland, called home few days back to tell us about her trip to a small town called Killybegs in Donegal. She was explaining about her sight-seeing experiences and then jokingly said, “Those people have preserved a tiny stone inscription that is just few hundred years old, and they were so proud about it!! We have so many buildings in our country that are thousands of years old!” We laughed about it for some time and after a pause, we realised how sad we all were.

Yes, we do have so many buildings that are thousands of years old, almost in every city, every town and every village in India. But are we really taking pride in the fact that our country has such a rich heritage? Is it just because, there is so much in abundance that we are very ignorant about it? If that is the case, aren’t we all committing a deadly sin?

There is always an argument about how westernised our “culture” is becoming. Maybe it is time, we start worrying about certain things that we are not western about - celebrating our heritage structures. It is a known fact that, our country boasts of so many historical monuments which date back to thousands of years. What about the other half, the monuments that we have forgotten to celebrate? What about the ones that is already in the process of dying? What about the ones that have already been buried beneath our feet? Well, what can we do after all! We are normal Indian citizens. We have enough issues to worry about like the petrol prices and the onion prices – where is the time to preserve all these old buildings? But yes, we do have time for protests about dress-codes, rallies against how our “culture” is getting spoiled due to western influence!

We have learnt and unlearnt so many things from the West. But I feel, one of the most important things that we have somehow not learnt or probably forgotten, over the years, is – celebrating our history!

Every time I visit an old temple, it always amazes me that I am walking on the stone that was laid by skilled craftsmen thousands of years ago. When I touch the walls and the sculptures, I imagine how sculptors would have done this back then. I always feel wonderful that I am alive to see this structure, walk around and feel the spaces that were made centuries ago. But the feeling disappears when I see scribbling like “I love you Hema”, images of heart with an arrow, signatures, cell phone numbers,etc., on that wall. I think these people should start using their bathroom walls for their emotional let out (as well)

It is very disheartening to see these beautiful old structures turning into large garbage dumping yards, a forest of thorny bushes or a doodle wall for “creative cartoonists”. These structures were once the dream of a royal king. His dream would have been to create a monument, so powerful, that will stand tall for centuries to tell his fame. It did stand alright. If only he knew what was going to happen to it, he would have probably created them in wood or mud that would have been demolished long back.

Some well preserved monuments DO exist in our country. The number is very very negligible, considering the rich history of this land, we are all proud of. Even among these well preserved monuments, some of them are in fact well preserved, just because they are religious in nature. Why does it always have to be either religious or political? For example, a very famous temple in India would also be a historically and architecturally significant building. But unfortunately, we end up highlighting only the “religious” part of the structure, and fail to appreciate the beauty of the structure and the whole vision with which it was built. Is it because I am an architect, that I feel this way? I don’t think so.

It is just not fair to these beautiful structures to come under just one tag – “religion”. It should be much more than that. People should be made to realise the significance of that building in history, made to realise why this was not done in any other part of the world before, why our land is filled with rich heritage. People should be banned from smearing oil or kumkum all over the temple walls. Temples and religious structures built by the kings were not only meant for worship. It was a stamp of their powerful establishment, a standing proof of what they were capable of, an exhibition of their skilled craftsmanship.

If not celebrate, let’s at least try not to destroy them. Let us preserve that last few traces of our rich history at least for our kids. The irony is, to those few people who travel all the way from the west to learn about our culture, we welcome them with a bold sign that says, “non- hindus not allowed inside”

“I love my country and I am proud of its rich and varied heritage. I shall always strive to be worthy of it” – Well, we don’t really mean it! Do we?

'Dental' torture

"Some tortures are physical and some are mental,
But the one that is both is dental." [ - This is going to hurt just a little bit, Ogden Nash]

For some reason, I have always remembered these lines from an old school poem. As destiny would have it, I realised a few days back, why i had remembered these lines for all these years. Because, i can now say, "SO TRUE!"

Yes, the event of me visiting a dentist, finally occurred in my life. My wisdom tooth, decided to suddenly grow in the X-axis instead of Y-axis (very unwise i would say) and left me with unbearable pain. So my dentist examined the X-ray and decided that my wisdom tooth (my only wisdom tooth) has to be uprooted, to avoid "infections in future". That is quite a scary phrase, which makes your mind to think only in the one direction - to go ahead with the tooth extraction. "It is a very normal procedure, don't worry" He assured.

So one fine Saturday, I was ready for the drill (literally). I was scared like a kid going for his first injection. When i sat on the dental chair, the dentist told something to the assistant, and the chair started moving up. My hands were cold. There were weird looking equipment in front of me with long wires. There were sharp, shiny instruments. Are these things going inside my mouth?! I was beginning to hyper-ventilate when suddenly my dentist appeared in front of me with a mask on his face. Oh my god! Is that..YES that is an injection in his hand. What is he going to do NOW! I opened my mouth to scream, but..

"yes, little more..open up your mouth" He said, and before i could pull myself together, the injection was in contact with my gums. It was the most horrible feeling EVER. Isn't there any easy way to do this at all? I felt like a Jew in a Nazi camp. He pulled out the injection and made me wait for 15 minutes for the local anesthetic to take effect.

After 15 minutes, I kept touching my teeth with my tongue to make sure I didn't feel anything , for at least a hundred times. My dentist also made sure, by tapping on it with some instrument which looked like a tiny hammer. I tried keeping my eyes open through the process, but couldn't. For one, the light above my head was as bright as the sun, and two, the weaponry they used looked very intimidating!

I can't quite describe the process that followed, but it never looked anything like they were working on part of a human body. They used drilling machines, for crying out loud! It was indeed like a road section (as mentioned in the poem) that was being worked on. Or even working on a clogged kitchen sink, maybe. That was the amount of force with which their hands were working. Thankfully i didn't feel a thing.

After they finally managed to pull out my tooth, they stitched it up with thread. I was drained out by then, with all the drilling and blasting and the concrete mixers , the smell of blood making me sick to my stomach. I came home happily, praising the effect of anesthetic.

Three hours later, well - AAAARRGGGGHHHHH. I couldn't eat, i couldn't speak, i couldn't even drink water or YAWN even! The pain level was beyond unbearable. Physical & mental - dental torture. Hope it is not a vicious cycle for me like Ogden Nash, but until then this is me with a swollen right cheek, saying "Please take care of your teeth"

PS: Here is the link to the famous poem by Ogden Nash


http://themindandthekeys.blogspot.in/2007/07/this-is-going-to-hurt-just-little-bit.html

The "infamous" civil war

Location: Camp A12

Time: 14 00 Hrs

“How much supplies do we have left for the day?”, the Deputy Leader in charge enquired with concern.

“Just enough for a hundred sir”, SoldierS47 replied. 

“And how many in the camp?”

“More than 2000 souls sir”

An eerie silence clouded the camp. The soldiers could sense the tension in their Deputy Leader’s face. Every ounce of motivation was draining away from their bodies and souls. Few days back, they would have thought this was possible, to win this battle. Since last night, things have drastically changed. They had just lost their Leader in a battle, and have hence lost their will.

“We don’t have much option, do we? Feed the women and children first. Make sure there is no stampede”, the Deputy Leader reluctantly declared.

“Yes sir”, soldier departed.

He called for an emergency meeting to all his soldiers. Every men of their race, was an armed soldier now. In fact, men in every household had become a soldier now – irrespective of them being armed or not. They all gathered around him.

“Gentlemen, we are at the end of the tunnel now. We have no choice but to fight till our last breath, and protect our people till the end. We will put up our best fight and die as warriors. When this war broke out, none of us believed, we could ever even face our mighty enemies. They are hundred times more powerful than us, in all possible ways. But, our Leader believed we could, and we believed him. We have the right to this land, as much as they do. Our ancestors have lived here for generations and they can only take this away from us over our corpses. So, let us get ready for the final battle of our lives, though the result is inevitable, giving up is something we are not used to”

As he was giving away his final inspirational speech, there was a hustle in the camp. A weary soldier was dragging himself towards them and finally fell on the ground. He was tired and thirsty and gasping for breath. He finally spoke “Sir, I have bad news. Camp A13 has been destroyed. They have ex-terminated 800 of us. Women and children included. They have used chemical weapons this time.”

The eerie silence clouded again. Soldiers hung their heads down. Few of them had tears in their eyes, thinking about their fellowmen mercilessly being killed somewhere nearby.

“Our camp might be their next target”, the Deputy Leader said in a low voice.

“uh..sir..it is not inevitable sir..” A feeble voice from the crowd emerged.  Everyone looked towards the direction, and it was soldierC194, who was also the head of communications.

“C194, what is not inevitable?”

“Sir, the result you mentioned sir, it is not inevitable”

“Haven’t you heard what he just said? They are using chemical weapons to ex-terminate us.”

“Sir, if you will let me, I have a plan.”

 His last few words were like a sudden shimmer of light inside the dark camp. There was pin drop silence and all eyes were on C194.

“Sir, all we have to do is, get the women and children out of this camp by midnight. And then we can carry out our operation after that. We would require soldiers to accompany our women and rest of us can be part of the operation”

“After midnight? Don’t you know our limitations? We never perform operations in the dark. We don’t have enough facilities. We cannot risk the lives of thousands of our women”

“This is the only choice we have left sir; you have to trust me on this. We have equipped soldiers who have travelled through the lengths and breadths of this land in the dark. And our enemies will never expect us to come out in the dark. This is almost a fool proof plan. If we can pull this off, victory is ours.”

“And where will they be re-located?”

“I have information from A22, about a safe place almost 45 degrees south of the camp. Nobody is aware of that place, and most unlikely for us to be spotted there. We even have access to food supplies from there sir”

“Even if they reach safe, how are going to help in this operation C194? What are you getting at?”

“Sir, we all have seen that heavy machinery that has been stalled near our base by the enemy camp.”

“ The humungous large tank that is almost thousand times bigger than ours - is that the one you are talking about?”

“Yes sir, all I know is that, that tank is of really high value to them. It is something, which they are proud of. If we all can manage to break into that tank, i am sure, by dawn, we can reach our destination and join our clan sir. Destroying the tank will be a huge diversion for them and we can help saving thousands of lives”

There were murmurings and whispers in the camp. Sighs of disbelief, worry, and fear all at once. But above all, the spirit of not giving up crept through the minds of every single man and they were up for their final operation.

“Let us do this!”  - the spirits soar high in the camp.

A battalion of 300 soldiers were selected, who were well-versed with the geography of the place, and who were part of the mapping and surveying divisions, to accompany the women and children.

The remaining 400 men, every man was a soldier now, were going to perform the mighty operation. Each one of the 400, were willing to die for their race and their land.

Location: Camp A12

Time: 21 30 Hrs

“Must you go?” She asked with tears in her eyes.

“I was the one who initiated this operation, how can I not go?” C194 held her close to his chest.

“I will stay here with you. How can I leave without knowing for sure you will be fine?”

“I will be, OK? Now, look at me”. He lifted her face and looked into her eyes. He wiped off the tears from her cheeks and kissed her. “I will see you even before this kiss dries out on your cheeks” 

She smiled. “I love you. Why can’t our lives be normal? Why do I have to sleep every night fearing that i might not wake up the next day or i might lose you forever?” She wept.

“I love you too, more than anything in this world. Don’t give up. Not just yet. I will meet you tomorrow when the sun shines on the ground, we will meet in the new place near campA22, a new life will begin, we will get married, have 10 kids, and one day when they wake up to see the sun, this land will be ours” He spoke with his eyes full of dreams and love. They kissed for a long time and finally said their good-byes.

Time: 00 00 Hrs.

The women and children were lined up and the soldiers were evenly located in the group as batches so that for every 50 people, there was a group of 10 soldiers at least. Women and children of all ages, not wanting to part their men, stood there in line, with tears in their eyes. After the final sign off from the Deputy leader, the group started moving slowly, through territories that were dark and inhabitable till now. The Deputy leader returned back to the camp. He had with him 400 men who were ready to give their lives. He couldn’t ask for more. They sat down to discuss their strategy, and gathered all the little weapon they had. They divided themselves into different batches and took charge of various portions of the “huge tank”. C194 was particular that the attack should not be concentrated, but evenly distributed into almost all parts of that tank.

Time: 03 00 Hrs.

Four different battalions started marching towards the tank, from campA12. The silhouette of the huge tank was seen in the distance. They have seen that mysterious tank many a times, but have never dared to attack or even go near it, just because of its sheer size. It was inside enemy lines, which was also one of the main reasons. But today was different. It is their final battle, for their land, their lives.

The tank was more complex than they had imagined. It had various compartments. It was also very difficult to figure the whole thing in the dark. The four battalions managed to enter the tank after an hour long process of trying to figure out the way of intruding the tank. Once they were inside, it was another tedious process to figure out their hiding places, so that they can promptly come out of it for the attack. There were many square shaped objects, which formed the main part of the tank. The main battalion, headed by C194, took charge of that. He ordered everyone to hide behind those square objects, which had gaps, just enough to accommodate them. It was a very complex design for them to understand, but they were happy that they got this far.

After two long hours, everyone was in position. Now they just have to wait. Wait for the dawn. In one hour the sun will be up, a new life will begin, or it will be the end. C194 closed his eyes for a while. He saw her smiling face.

Time: 07 30 Hrs.

Sandhip had woken up early as it was his presentation day. He opened his laptop to check his presentation for one last time. He was bewildered.

“MOMMMMMMMMMMM!! there are ants all over my keyboard”. He took his laptop and started running towards the kitchen.

“Stop screaming. Haven’t I told you not to eat your snacks next to the laptop?”

“But i have presentation .. Maaa.. these ants..i am going to kill all of them” , Sandhip was furious.

“Ok relax, just keep your laptop in the sun. Keep it in the balcony for ten minutes and all the ants will go away”

“Fine. I am telling you i am going to buy that insecticide chalk this evening and get rid of this ant menace.”

Sandhip kept grumbling all the way, and placed his laptop in the balcony.

C194 emerged out of the laptop with a smile. His operation was a success. A new life begins..

மாற்றம் ஒன்று தான் மாறாததா?

அம்மா, அப்பா,அத்தை, மாமா, தாத்தா என அனைவரும் இட்லி வேண்டும் என்றுவிட, எனக்கும் அண்ணனுக்கும் மட்டும் தோசை வாங்குவது என்று முடிவு செய்தேன். வீட்டின் அருகிலேயே இருக்கும் அந்த சிறிய ஹோட்டலுக்கு போகும் வழியில் எத்தனை இட்லிகள் என்று கணக்கு செய்து கொண்டிருந்தேன்.

அப்பாவுக்கும் மாமாவுக்கும் நாலு, நாலு என்று எட்டு. தாத்தா,அம்மா,அத்தைக்கு மூன்று மூன்று என்று ஒன்பது. "எதற்கும் ரெண்டு இட்லி எக்ஸ்ட்ரா வாங்கிட்டு வா " என்று அம்மா கடைசியில் எப்பொழுதும் சொல்லும் இட்லியும் சேர்த்து , மொத்தம் 19 இட்லிகள். ஒத்தை படை எண் என்றால் டிவியின் வாலியுமை கூட மாற்றும் நான், 20 இட்லிகள் வாங்கலாம் என்று முடிவு செய்தேன். 

உள்ளே நுழைந்ததும் இருந்த கூட்டத்தைக் கண்டு முகம் சுழித்தேன். பார்சல் வாங்கும் கவுன்டரில் ஒரு நீளமான வரிசை இருந்தது. அமர்ந்து சாப்பிடும் அளவு போதிய இட வசதி இல்லாததால், இங்கே அநேகமாக பார்சல் வாங்கவே வருவார்கள். இருக்கும் ஒரு 4-5 இருக்கைகளும் காலியாக இல்லை. நீண்ட வரிசையில் நின்று கொண்டே, அங்கும் இங்கும் நடமாடும் மனிதர்களை கவனிக்க தொடங்கினேன். 

எல்லோருடைய நடவடிக்கைகளிலும் ஒரு விதமான அவசரம் தெரிந்தது. ஹோட்டல் என்றாலே எல்லாரும் ஓடி கொண்டே தான் பரிமாற வேண்டும் என்பது நம் ஊரின் எழுத படாத விதி போலும்!  ஆனால் , உட்கார்ந்து உணவு உண்பவர்களும் அதே அவசரத்தோடு தான் இருந்தார்கள். இன்றைய உலகில் அவசரம் என்பது கூட ஒரு வகை வியாதி தான். 

அங்கே அமர்ந்திருந்த மீசை  காரர், மீசையில் சாம்பார் இருந்ததை கூட அறியாமல், ஹோட்டலை விட்டு அவசரமாக வெளியேறி கொண்டிருந்தார். ஆமை வேகத்தில் வரிசை நகர்ந்து கொண்டிருந்தது. எனக்கு முன்னால் நின்றவரோ, "பரோட்டா வாங்கவா இல்ல ஊத்தப்பம் வாங்கவா" என்று தன் போனில் பேசுவதாக நினைத்து உலகத்திற்கே அந்த முக்கியமான கேள்வியை கேட்கிறார்!

சலித்துக் கொண்டே திரும்பிய நான், சற்று தொலைவில் அந்த அம்மாவையும் சிறுவனையும் கண்டேன். அந்த பெண்ணின் முகத்தில் ஒரு பொலிவு,  புன்னகை, நிரந்திரமாக குடியிருப்பதை ஆச்சிரியத்துடன் பார்த்தேன். அவளும் அந்த சிறுவனும், அவள் மகனாக இருக்க வேண்டும், அப்படி என்னதான் பேசி கொள்கிறார்கள் என்று ஆர்வமாக இருந்தது. இத்தனை கூட்ட  நெரிசலிலும், அந்த காட்சி ஏனோ என் முகத்தை மலர செய்தது, ஒரு கூட்டமான பேருந்தில் , ஒரு மழலை சிரிப்பை பார்த்து, தன்னை மறந்து முகம் மலறுவது போல. 

வரிசையில் மெல்ல முன்னேறிக்கொண்டே அவர்களை பார்த்து கொண்டே இருந்தேன். அவர்களது உலகம் தனியாக இருந்தது. சுற்றி இருக்கும் இந்த மனிதர்களின் அவசரமும், எரிச்சலும் அவர்கள் முகத்தில் இல்லை. யாரோ ஒரு மனிதர் அந்த பெண்னிடம் எதையோ கேட்க வருகிறார். அவரின் முகத்தை என்னால் சரியாக பார்க்க முடியவில்லை. அந்த பெண்ணின் முகத்தில் மற்றும் ஏதாவது மாற்றம் தெரிகிறதா என்று பார்த்தேன். அந்த புன்னகை மட்டும் மறையவே இல்லை. 

வரிசையில் எனக்கு முன்னால் ஒருவர் மட்டுமே இருந்தார். அவர் இன்னும் பரோட்டவா உத்தப்பமா என்று முடிவு செய்யவில்லை போலும்.கவுன்டரில் இருந்தவர் , "சார் பரோட்டா முடிஞ்சுது சார்" என்று சொன்னதும் தான் எனக்கு உயிரே வந்தது. ஒரு வழியாக அவர் அரை மனதுடன் உத்தப்பம் வாங்க டோக்கன் வாங்கிவிட்டு சென்றார். நானும் பணத்தை கட்டிவிட்டு, டோக்கன் வாங்கிவிட்டு அந்த பெண்ணை நோக்கி சென்றேன்.

"சொல்லுப்பா ..என்ன வேணும்?"

"20 இட்லி.. 2 தோசை.."

"அவ்வளோ தானப்பா ?"

"ஆமா "

அதே புன்னகை.இட்லியை அவள் கட்ட ஆரம்பிக்கும் பொழுது , அந்த சிறுவன், சாம்பார் , சட்னியை கட்டிக் கொண்டிருந்தான். பாதி முடிந்ததும், உள்ளே சென்று, "அண்ணே ..ரெண்டு தோச ரெடியா " என்று கத்திக் கொண்டு வந்தான். இவனும் அந்த அம்மா வும் ஏதாவது பேச மாட்டார்களா என்று பார்த்து கொண்டே இருந்தேன். தங்களின் வேலைகளை பொறுமையாக, பேசாமலே செய்து கொண்டிருந்தார்கள் இருவரும். 

எல்லாம் கட்டி முடிந்த பிறகு , எனது பையில் பொறுமையாக எடுத்து வைத்தேன். இன்னும் பேசவில்லை அவர்கள் இருவரும். நான் கிளம்பும் சமயம் ஒருவர் வந்து , "சாம்பார் 20 பாக்கேட் இருக்கானு பார்த்துக்கோங்க " என்றார்.

"சார் கரெக்டா தான் சார் வெச்சிருக்கேன் " என்றான் அந்த சிறுவன் முதல் முறையாக அந்த ஆளை பார்த்து. 

"இல்ல இருக்கட்டும் சரியா தான் இருக்கும் " என்றேன்.

"அட.. எடுத்து ஒரு வாட்டி பாத்துக்கோங்க .." என்றார் அந்த ஆள். அவர் சூப்பர்வைசர் போலும். 

எடுத்து சரி பார்க்கும் பொழுது என் கை தவறி சாம்பார் பாக்கெட் கிழே விழுந்து தரை எல்லாம் சிந்தியது. எனக்கு மிகவும் சங்கடமாகி விட்டது. 

"ஐயோ .. சாரி.. " என்று பதறினேன்.

"சார்.. நீங்க சொல்லாம இருந்திருந்த ..இப்படி ஆகிருக்குமா ? " என்று அந்த சிறுவன் கோவமாக அந்த சூப்பர்வைசரை பார்த்து கேட்டான். 

"என்னடா வாய் நீளுது உனுக்கு? கஸ்டமர் முன்னாடி இப்படி தான் பேசுவியா ? அன்னைக்கு வாங்கினது பத்தல போல? "

அந்த பெண் , "சார்.. நான் பாத்துக்குறேன் சார்..நீங்க போங்க " என்று தன் கையை அந்த சிறுவனின் தோளில் வைத்தாள் . சூப்பர்வைசர் அமைதியாக நகர்ந்து போக, எனக்கோ குற்ற உணர்வால் செய்வதறியாமல் நின்றேன்.

"தெரியாம கை தவறி.. " என்று நான் ஆரம்பிக்க, 

"பரவாயில்லப்பா ..இதோ இன்னொரு பாக்கெட் கட்டி தர சொல்றேன் " என்றாள் சிரித்துக் கொண்டே. தரையை துடைத்து சுத்தம் செய்தாள் . சிறுவனின் முகத்தில் இன்னும் கோவம் தெரிந்தது. மறுபடியும் சாம்பார் பாக்கெட்டை கட்டிக் கொடுத்தான் . . 

இங்கே இருந்து உடனே சென்று விட வேண்டும் என்று தோன்றியது எனக்கு. பையில் வைத்து விட்டு, அவர்களை பார்த்து ஒரு முறை புன்னகைத்து விட்டு கிளம்பினேன். திரும்பி பார்க்காமல் , மிகவும் மெதுவாக அடி எடுத்து வைத்து சென்றேன். எனக்கு பின்னால், முதல் முறையாக , அவள் அந்த சிறுவனிடம் பேசுவதை கேட்டேன்..

"டேய் ..உள்ள அண்ணே சாப்பாடு எடுத்து வெச்சிருக்கு .. போய் சாப்பிட்டு வா.."

அது சரி. அம்மா வேற என்ன பேசுவாள்? 

"Fair" is not "Lovely"

Require bride within 20-22 yrs., 5’-2”, fair, pretty, good-looking, homely, minimum H.S./graduate. 

Require bride both EB/WB, caste no bar, fair, beautiful, minimum Madhyamik, homely/working bride

Rs. 30,000 P.M. Fair, handsome, modgulya, father rtd. principal govt. high school. Require bride, WB, homely, fair

Professionally qualified slim, beautiful, fair, match.

These are some random classifieds that i found on the internet. Somehow, we (Indians) tend to associate the term “Fair” with superlative degrees of beauty. Like “Fair&Lovely”, “Fair&Pretty”, “Fair&Beautiful”, etc. Sometimes it gets as absurd as even “Fair&Slim”. I would love to be Fair in that case, if i can easily pass for a slim chic! The worst of all the “Fair” beauty myth , the one which i have feared all my life, has already happened in India. Yes – Now guys have to be “Fair” & “Handsome”. Really?! Whatever happened to the “Tall, dark & handsome” hunks we drooled over!?

The situation is not as light as it seems. This myth, sown by our very own Brits, who managed to sow many such seeds in the very fragile Indian minds, has taken very deep roots  into our socio-cultural systems, and stands tall posing an unshakable image! This myth has grown into each and every mind of an Indian, so much, that when two people meet after a long time, “Hey how have you been all these years! You have gone dark? you look so dull, what happened?”, such conversations have become very common in every Indian household. So if a guy/girl becomes darker in complexion, means, he/she has ceased to be attractive anymore! Seems very ridiculous you might think. But wait! There is more –

“....The couple wanted a donor with ‘ very fair’ skin, but, since someone with such a special physical attribute was not available on Indian databases, the couple decided to look abroad for Caucasian or ‘white’ egg donors.” (a case in Mumbai which happened earlier this month)

Yes. It has reached this level already! I am dreading a situation in India when “Colour” is going to appear right next to the Age,Sex,Religion,Caste columns. It is already there; just that it is invisible for now. But it is just implied, like a silent letter in a word.

In 2009, there was huge outcry about the racial abuses the Indian students faced in Australia. The Indian media was all over the place reporting how the Australians, were racist maniacs! Well, Hello? Reality check – aren’t we doing the same, back home? In seeking a fair bride, a fair groom or even a fair donor!?

Thanks to the millions of money invested in fairness creams industries, Indian girls have managed to glue themselves strongly to this “fair” myth. So there are these fairness cream commercials, which shows a girl who is dark and low in confidence, and a failure in life, then comes the fairness cream to the rescue, and what a miracle! Life becomes so beautiful , the girl clears job interview, she becomes a pilot, gets the guy she wants, wins laurels for the nation, becomes CM, PM, and what not! Aren’t we supposed to be ashamed that we are caught up in such a messy web of illusion? Are we really that dumb, to think that “fairness” of skin makes you a successful person? Truth is, we are. Why else would the market for fairness creams in India touch nearly 2000 crores? And now with more “fair & handsome” guys, I am pretty sure, this figure will just keep rising.

It is “higher” than high-time, we wake up and come out of this “fair’ myth. Honestly, i don’t see that happening in the next hundred years, atleast. But we always have believed in change. So we shall continue to do so.

“Fairness” of skin is just pigmentation. People in India are darker than people in America, is just for the scientific reason that we are located closer to the equator, and our skin cells are designed to reflect UV radiation better, hence darker. So next time, somebody “sympathises” with you for not being born “fair”, tell them you reflect much better UV radiation than them!

Look beyond the pigmentation, at the bigger picture, and yes, Fair is not lovely. I want to end this post with a Tamil poem written by the legendary poet, Subramaniya Bharathiyar.
(Mind you, he wrote this poem in early 1900s)

Vellai  nirathoru poonai-engal

Veetil valaruthu kander!

Pillaigal petrathap punai -avai

Peruk korunira magum!

Sambal niramoru kutti - karunj

Sandhu niramoru kutti!

Pambin niramoru kutti-vellaip

Palin niramoru kutti!

EndaNiramirunthalum-avai

Yavum orethara mandro?

Intha Niramsiri dhendrum - idhu

Eatramen runcholla lamo?

- Put an end to racism, it begins at home, in your mirror! 

My weight loss "tamasha"

So, officially even i have caved in to the pressure of having to look “slim and sexy”. I have to make a note here though, that i strived hard till my last breath! Well, the peer pressure mounted on and got the better of me.

It was my second week in the gym, and i was being introduced to “weights”. Being a first-timer at the gym (or to any physical exercise for that matter), i was very curious to try all those weird looking weight equipment.

I saw people with a very stern look on their faces (reminded me of a villain from a tamil movie), operating the leg press machines, the cross-trainers, shoulder press equipment etc (just showing off all the new names i learnt). I also saw people running fiercely on the treadmill, very fast that i was scared they might slide backwards and fly away.  It was a little intimidating in the beginning, but later, i had gotten used to it. I was very excited to start the weights session, as i felt like i was moving to the next level, feeling like a pro already!

I was given a brief introduction by my trainer about how important weights exercises are and how it strengthens our upper body and makes our muscles strong. I was feeling very pumped up. There were two other girls with me who were “senior members” of the gym, and were obviously giving me looks which meant “Oh..You poor little beginner”

I shrugged off those looks and concentrated on the dumbbells.

“So you can begin with 1KG for the start and do shoulder shrugging”, my trainer instructed.

I lifted the 1 KG dumbbell. I felt it wasn’t very heavy. My face brightened, which caught the attention of my trainer.

“If it is not too heavy, you can begin with 2KG also”, she suggested.

Should have been a little subtle with the expression, i thought. Anyway i decided to face the challenge and lifted the 2KG dumbbell. I never thought 2KG was this heavy. My face showed the exact expression and my trainer seemed very happy now. I was crying inside and started with my “shoulder shrugging” with these HEAVY 2KGs in both my hands.  I never feel this heavy when i put on extra 2kgs of body fat, but this seems very heavy, so not fair!

I looked at myself in the mirror, a lump of fat with a dead expression on the face. I hate gym, i thought to myself.

“I can actually feel my biceps stronger after doing all these weights exercises”

“Oh yes, you know the whole point of doing this is to make your body stronger”

“See, now i even feel my stamina has increased..the other day i climbed up two floors and i did not pant that much”

“I knowww! I felt the sameee”

The two girls were showing off how strong they both have become. It was getting on my nerves. I decided to take a break as my shoulders started aching. I went to the water purifier to have some water and found the inverted water can above the purifier was empty. I called for the maintenance lady who was cleaning the lockers and asked her to refill the can. While i was waiting for her, i saw how all the other girls were lifting weights, and struggling hard to keep them fit and strong. They were sweating profusely; well you had to make each rupee of the membership fee worth, right? 

As i stood there watching them, in front of me was the maintenance lady lifting a 25litre(25kgs) water can at ease, lifting with both hands, and turned it upside down over the purifier with such grace and elegance without showing any signs of strain on her face!

“There you go” she said.

I smiled at her and looked back at my 2KGs. I felt like an idiot.